I have spent my entire life hiding in the murky waters of the abyss because I liked it.
It was cold, dark, and the greatest blanket nature could offer.
Then one day I chased a flickering light, the twilight, to the sky.
I chased round, round, and never seemed to get anywhere.
Twenty one years later I realized the light was coming from me.

I did something a few nights ago that was really hard for me
though it probably would seem like something easy to everyone else.
I played a game that brought with it some rough memories
and unpleasant dreams.

But I am proud
(but not as proud as I thought I’d be)
I did it because I wanted to
and I’d like to think I was ready.

A lot of changes have been happening for me
(good changes)
But because of them I feel suddenly suffocated by this darkness
and like I must get out to finally reach all those other fish
and see them truly for the first time.

I am an ugly fish girl
but all my scales are falling out
and something else is beginning to take their place.

And so for the time being I’m bare.
Exposed.