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Jei gave a speech. I was so, so, very proud of him. The entire family was composed until he got up there. There isn’t much else to say except I am still very proud. He’s very strong.

There are lots of things on my mind, and for once I feel like I might actually want to share the load a little but for whatever reason I just can’t. Everyone’s in their own world doing their own things. I feel a little isolated. I’m not even sure how to begin asking for help. And the worst part is when it’s offered, and I just can’t manage to say, “Yes, yes, I really would like that. I need you.”

It’s a little funny, this feeling inside.

I’ll keep myself busy with the little things, I guess. Memorizing Gallop apace, cleaning the kitchen, finishing my room, accomplishing that list from earlier. My standard run is now at two miles. I’ll get this whole situation all worked out, I know I will. I just need to figure out which way is up.

This is the last post I’ll make about it, though.
The rest is all smiles.

Posted in her sadness |
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