Tonight I almost died. Allow me to explain.

It’s a dark and stormy night and I decide to take a late night shower. As I slip behind the curtain and began my normal routine, I find myself overcome with the urge to begin chewing on my own arm. After several struggling minutes (as well as bite marks) later I regain my composure and finish washing my hair. I’m just about to turn off the water when the door to the bathroom flies open, banging against the wall. My roommate groans, “Cinnn…a…. bun……”

I then realize that it’s the first time I’m using my Cinnamon Bun Heaven body wash. That is why I almost chewed off my own arm! And that’s why my roommate was now in the bathroom, ready to zombie eat me alive! So I scream bloody murder of course and charge out of the bathroom as fast as possible, a flesh eating Cinnamon Bun zombie roomie at my back! Luckily, I manage to make it downstairs in time to clobber him with a full one gallon milk jug from our refrigerator at which point he collapses to the floor.

Unfortunately for me, that is when Jei comes home. He looks at me, and the milk jug and says, “Cinnamon buns and milk? Yum!”

I run. It only takes mere seconds to realize I won’t stand a chance against him at all and so I bolt again for the stairs with the intent of making it out and onto the roof.

I’m half way up the stairs when I’m snatched from behind and tackled! I’m being bitten! Ouch! It hurts! Jei is eating my flesh! And Jei ate most of my flesh off so now I’m in intensive care. But I’ll live.

Obviously this is an exaggeration.
But I just love my new body wash and body lotion.